I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
