Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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