the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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