Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
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