If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
