it glows. i had to have it.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
