Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
