Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Green mimosas i think yes
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
