ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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