What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
