return my video game
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Randomize
