Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
time to smoke my breakfast
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
