no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
