I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
