i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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