so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
