i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
