I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
