I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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