It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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