You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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