I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
