i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
