Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize