I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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