Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I am one with the molecules
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
