i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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