Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
