if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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