is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
