My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize