i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
