3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
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