She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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