No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize