We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
