I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
