ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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