Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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