"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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