I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'm just crazy horny about you
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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