i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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