Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
