If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize