when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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