Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Randomize
