And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Come see our sink grown plant.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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