i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
