peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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