If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
The struggles of a small town man whore
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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